Star: I know it sounds strange, Duck, but I’d love to see more grief in romance.
Duck: Star, that does sound rather ducked up, then again, you’re human so it probably makes a duck of lot of sense.
Star: Exactly. And when I watched Bridget Jones: Mad About The Boy, which by the way I haven’t read, I thought I was going to get a little sensitive duck-sized grief. And in a way, I did.
Duck: Grief is rarely duck-shaped, Star. Except when it’s served with duck sauce. Anyway, what did you think about the film?
Star: There’s a lot to love in Mad About The Boy. Renée Zellweger did a marvelous job in this role, really adding depth to her character. It was lovely to see Bridget at a maturer stage in her life, having a love affair with a much younger guy—big diversity points there. Plus Bridget’s other love interest Mr. Walliker (Chiwetel Ejiofor) was captivating. Outside of the divine Mr. Walliker, however, it would have been nice to see more racial diversity, and some LGBTQIA+ diversity too.
Duck: Now, I was expecting you to be a bit loud-quacky after seeing the next Bridget Jones movie. I remember when you re-read Bridget Jones’ Diary, Star, twenty years after you first discovered it. Good cod, did it shock your flippers off!
Star: True! Many duck ponds ago, when I first read the novel, I was a huge fan of Bridget Jones’ Diary. Then a couple of decades later, when I reread the novel as an audiobook, horror filled my duck-shaped heart. While the book was still HILARIOUS, I was BEYOND SHOCKED at the POLITICAL QUACKDUCKERY. Had I really laughed at it all and not objected, back then??? I mean, given how long it had been, I knew the novel wasn’t going to be easygoing politically, but the racism, misogyny, homophobia, and other duckless bigotry really wrecked my beak-shine.
Duck: But Mad About The Boy put more of a spring in your flippers, you say?
Star: Well, I did only see the movie. But let me tell you, duck-friend, it’s sensitive and lovely. The cast is flipper-ticklingly SENSATIONAL, with Hugh Grant adding such gorgeous complexity to his portrayal of the mature Daniel Cleaver that his performance was still on my mind weeks after seeing the film. And the screenplay’s treatment of the age difference between Bridget and her younger beau, Roxter (Leo Woodall), is very thoughtfully dealt with.
Now, it’s a duck of a lot of fun, Mad About The Boy, and the complexity of the relationship between Bridget Jones and her much younger boyfriend is simply GORGEOUS. Politics are generally excellent. Duckworthy viewing with a tender love story at the heart, which shut ageism down with aplomb. The humor was ducking enjoyable too. For me, there was only one disappointment. Bridget is mourning her hubby, Mark Darcy (Colin Firth) at the start of the film, but once the film gets underway, it’s almost as though that grief floats away. On the pond of Mad About The Boy, grief paddles off too swiftly and easily. And since Grief and I are old friends, I’d like to see it honored more fully.
Duck: Now, Star, a little bird (my peacock partner, as it happens) tells me you’re working on a romance manuscript in which one of the protagonists is still grieving over the loss of her father.
Star: True. And it’s beak-to-flippers difficult to navigate in some ways. The story cannot be dampened or weighed down by grief—many of us want to escape in our romance, and that’s never been more important than it is right now. But as a powerful feeling, grief can be as much of a draw as a hurdle. I remember, when I was first dating Jake it was hard to tell him about my father’s death. Dad died in a very tragic and traumatic way, which I won’t go into here, and this worsened my relationship with other family members, while also making me shy of relating on a deeper level with anyone else for a good, long while. But telling Jake about how Dad died brought us immediately closer because Jake accepted the tragedy, opened to it, embraced how hard it was, and loved me all the more for it. The loss of my father became part of our love story. A deep and tender part.
Duck: It’s like when you’re a duck and you lose your rubber ducky, suddenly it’s harder to paddle, but some gentle flipper-nibbles from a small fish can really make you feel seen. In a grief way, I mean. Wait. I’m not sure that made any sense. *confused quacking*
Star: But I think you’ve got it, my smart-flippered bestie. Grief, once it’s not all-consuming anymore, is an opportunity to go deeper.
Duck: And if you’re a duck, you can always eat the fish that nibbles your flippers. That’s another way of going deeper. You and the fish are together for the rest of time.
Star: On that very moving note, I think I’ll return to my writing. And I’ll be gentle about how I handle my protagonist’s grief. She’s got a pond of her own, in a way, and there’s a lot under the surface. She may need a bit of a deep dive into her unconscious if she wants to put the past behind her. But grief can be a friend once we’ve made our peace with it, and that can make our relationships deep and powerful.
Duck: And sometimes you need a deep dive to get the best lunch! My beak-holes are watering at the very thought …..
At the time of writing, you can watch Bridget Jones: Mad About The Boy here:
Peacock (with subscription)
YouTube (with a charge)
Apple (with a charge)
Google Play (with a charge)
Romancey Pants 